What’s that quote again? “Time flies, but the memories last forever.” 

I believe there’s a corny Kid Cudi song about this… I will say that he definitely was onto something.

—

Do you ever feel like time is slipping away?

One day, you are biking around with your neighborhood gang after a long day of elementary school. You talk about how cool your babysitters are and dream about the day you become 16 – just like them. 

Then you blink, and you’re 18 and moved into your college freshman dorm. You are itching to say goodbye to your parents and ready for your first night of adult freedom.

You spend nights out with new friends, hoping your fake ID will work, counting down the days to mark the next chapter of your life: the day you become 21.

You blink again, and now you’re grown up with a college degree. You moved into your first adult apartment, preparing to take the real world by storm.

You may start traveling all over the world. 

Most likely making new friends and shedding old ones. 

You may dial in and make strides in your career or decide you’re not done with school and set off to get another degree.

Or, if you’re lucky, you’ll find the love of your life. 

No matter the journey that unfolds before you, we blink again, and suddenly, we are closer to 30 than our teens, wondering where all the time has gone. 

And the only consistent thing is how time is so fleeting.

–

They weren’t lying when they said that time flies.

So much has happened since we last spoke!

• I celebrated my 26th birthday with all my favorite humans
• Celebrated the engagement of one of my oldest childhood friends from elementary school
• Celebrated more birthdays and more life with good food, a lot of dancing, and many sleepless nights yapping with my best friends

Just two weeks ago, I traveled to Denver to visit my dear friend Haley.

Haley and I met on bid day during our first year of college in 2016.

Haley is one of those girls you meet, and suddenly you understand how there could be a human form of a ray of sunshine… She is the true definition of a genuine soul who loves a good time. 

But don’t let the bright-colored exterior fool you… If you ever think of crossing Haley or any of her friends, I suggest you stop and walk away because she is a force of nature, and you will regret that you even thought of doing such a thing. 

She will storm through the gates of hell for her girls, and I’ve seen this unfold firsthand many times. 

Eight years of friendship later, I am flying to the Mile High to visit my college bestie, see her new adult apartment, and get a glimpse into her adult life for the weekend—and it was perfect.

My only request for the weekend was that she show me around all her favorite spots, and our first stop was the taco shop she’d been going to since high school. 

As we reminisced about our crazy college escapades over a couple of margaritas, I started to think about how we perceive time and the memories we hold. 

How is it that so much time separates us from our favorite memories, yet when we talk about them, it feels like it happened just yesterday?

Sometimes, a memory comes back to you, and you can remember the exact feeling you had and retrace the details of that exact moment.

Maybe you hear a song from that one album for the first time in a long time, and suddenly, feelings from that time resurface.

Or you could get a whiff of a past lover’s cologne or the air that smells familiar to early mornings at summer camp, and you are transported back to a different time. 

How beautiful is it that these great memories are moments that will never change?

Time stands still within that memory, and you can return to the past.

I certainly hope that the memories that find their way back to us are always the good ones.

—

I find myself traveling to the past often.

And I am sure you find yourself taking a visit down memory lane every now and then, too. 

I love recounting old memories with friends, revisiting past versions of ourselves, and sharing stories about the growth we’ve all witnessed in each other’s lives. 

I don’t know if you can tell by now, but I am a hugeeee Notes app girl.

Any random thought, melancholy poetry, late-night vulnerable journal entries, and a ridiculous number of lists about nothing and everything. It’s in there. 

I’m being serious. I. Love. Lists. I love lists so much that I power-ranked the Baddies of Pixar one time… and obviously crowned our slim-thicc favorites Elastic Girl and Bo Peep in Toy Story 3… I’ll digress.

Anyway.

A couple of years ago, I started this list titled “Moments Worth Living For” after a night out with one of my childhood best friends and roommate, Arielle. She goes by Pop in my life. 

Pop and I have these nights called “Free Will Nights.” On these nights, we perform a series of random side quests in one day, which always results in an iconic night. 

Our first-ever Free Will night started with “just one drink” after work. 

We hadn’t spent quality time together in a while, and after being heads down in work for what felt like an eternity, we were due for a lot of catching up.

After bopping around, taking one signature shot from each bar in our neighborhood, we ended our night with a karaoke room, a big ‘ol bucket of Coronas, and two beautiful overly confident voices ready to perform. 

I remember smiling so big and looking over at my childhood best friend, belting her heart out to High School Musical’s “Start of Somethin’ New.” We had spent a beautiful evening in our neighborhood, celebrating new life successes, and sharing how proud we were of each other’s growth — and now we’re singing along to our favorite childhood songs to wrap up our night. 

Do you ever take a second to look around and enjoy the moment? 

And I mean, really take in the moment. Your heart gets a little warm and fuzzy, your smile gets a little bigger, and you wish to pause at that moment, hoping it will last a little longer. 

That night was one of the first times in a long time that I was reminded that little moments like this make life worth living. 

It makes any hardship you faced before this a little easier on your shoulders because you survived, you are standing tall and you are laughing again.

This night goes down in history as one of the most memorable nights of my life.

Since then, many memories have been recorded on the list — some small, some big, and even some random moments that may not have been a big deal to others but are forever ingrained in my brain.

Whatever it may be, if I have that look-around-and-take-it-in moment to myself, I pull out my notes app and capture that moment in real time.

And if I’m ever sad, for whatever reason, I will pull that list out and recount the moments I felt alive. 

—

While recounting great moments from our past is beautiful, it’s important to recognize that there are times when we experience the exact opposite.

I am not afraid to admit that there are versions of myself that are not my proudest moments – these moments brought me great sadness, grief, shame, embarrassment, anger, and all the other not-so-great feelings.

Alas, there are no highs without lows – and that is okay. That is life.

These are things I lived through. I can’t escape them; they will always be part of me, and there is nothing to be ashamed of. 

What I can do is understand that these moments also require a little more love, care, and attention for healthy growth, to come out of the other side, and to turn that pain into something worthwhile. 

I once read somewhere that everything in life is about love, and when it is not about love, it is about the absence of love.

If we reframe these moments of sadness, grief, or whatever we’re dealing with as moments when we are missing love, I hope we all find it a little easier to give ourselves some grace. 

The absence of love is hurting you, and that is okay. 

Shit happens. And shit will probably continue to happen. Life is never perfect.

But guess what the great news is?

You will survive. You will find the presence of love again, whether it is through yourself or the people and the world around you.

It is your badge of honor — that you are human, you are resilent, and you are experiencing life in its entirety, with all its ebbs and flows.

“Grief is love’s souvenir. It’s our proof that we once loved. Grief is the receipt we wave in the air that says to the world: Look! Love was once mine. I love well. Here is my proof that I paid the price.”

Glennon Doyle Melton, Love Warrior

As I’ve been working on this piece, I keep returning to a conversation I had with a good friend a bit ago. 

As he made breakfast, I asked existential questions – as one does bright and early at 10 AM.

Around that time, I was met again with my late aunt’s anniversary and wondered how it had been almost 12 years since her spirit was set free. 

As we shared stories about grief and the passage of time after a loved one passed away, I asked him if he believed in heaven. 

He paused and said, “I believe you live on through the people you’ve touched.”

I remember looking at him across the kitchen table, taken aback by how profound that was.

Our legacy is every life we’ve touched. It is how we show up daily for ourselves and the people around us.

It is in moments, no matter how small or significant each act of love is.

It is the memories we create with the world around us.

The memories that bond us and our relationships with a moment in time that stands still.  

Like the memories I recounted with Haley or when Pop and I shared our first Free Will night. 

—

Memories are one of the most precious possessions we have in life. 

They narrate the stories of our lives. These are defining moments that shape who we are.

They tell us who we have connected with, who have touched our lives, and those we have touched.

They also serve as the foundation of our knowledge of ourselves and the world, between our greatest triumphs and humbling failures. 

My late aunt once told me, “If you try and focus on the good stuff, the bad stuff doesn’t seem so bad.”

We should hold onto the good moments like precious treasure. Other times, we must let go of the not-so-good moments to release the weight of burdens, be free, and to make space for better things ahead.

Memories help us reflect on the past, make sense of the present, and teach us how to learn and evolve for our future.

—

Time is so fleeting, which makes life so precious. 

Everything can be gone in a blink of an eye. 

While it may seem like there is not enough time in this life, you can find opportunities to capture moments that will be a memory replayed for years to come.

These memories are a gift to us, residing in our hearts forever. No matter how much time has passed, it will never be erased. 

With all of this in mind, I can’t help but think about these questions:

• What memories do you want to create? 
• How are we building a life of substance?
• When you reflect on your life, will you be proud of yourself or regret things you wish you had done?
• How do you want to remember your life?
• What do you want your life to be remembered by?

While these are big (and scary) questions, they are helping me be more conscious and intentional about how I spend my days. They help me close the gap between my present self and the person I hope to become as I navigate my life.

As we stand in the present, with the past behind us and the future waiting to be written, I hope we all find time to live each moment fully and to savor the joys and pleasures before they become a memory in the past. 

When you reflect on these past memories, I hope they show you how much you’ve grown and serve as a reminder to continue to create opportunities to enjoy the little moments in life. 

You can’t put a price on time. 

But every now and then, when you soak in a beautiful moment, you might just feel like the wealthiest person in the world. 

/mm